Cornell University is an incredible private research institution that offers students endless opportunities. But with great power, comes great responsibility in this superhero analogy.
Cornell makes sure that you deserve to be here. Whether its the academics, the countless hills you must walk up, the unpredictable Ithacan weather, or the “oh shit, the prelim is tomorrow?!” routine.
I feel like i have let people down, but at the same time feel that this an all-important lesson in my matriculation as a student, young adult and another 20-year-old very prone to common mistakes.
I always use this quote but it always applies to real-life situations it can never be overused: “Experience is a hard teacher; it gives the test first and the lesson afterwards.”
Take my Evolutionary Biology class: I just took Introductory Biology over the summer, a class that although introductory, put a major emphasis on the major eukaryotic lineages, evolutionary theory and concepts, yet did not provide me the study skills and diligent preparation needed for the course I am currently taking.
First prelim I bombed: got a 37. And it wasn’t out of 50. Only thing worse than that is turning in a blank test, and hoping your name on the paper solidifies a sympathy point.
They say every Cornellian faces his first semester woes, and boy have I hit it right on the money.
Ithaca threw me down on my ass and made me hit the ground so hard I bounced twice, and my tailbone was sore for a month.
The tailbone of course is a vestigial organ, or a a physical attribute that has lost most, if not all of its original function. Thank you for that lesson Evo Bio! Too bad the phylogenetic trees left me as dumbfounded as a deer approaching headlights, only knowing for a split second it was going to get hit very, very hard.
Suffice it to say, I can’t say I have learned how to assimilate into the rigors of Cornell academia, but I have sure grown as far as knowing what to expect when that good ole’ prelim comes around.
This semester I have:
Been given the smallest dorm room on the entire floor
Gone through two roommates
Failed two exams and one assignment
Gave the Daily Sun an incorrect headline which led to my demise as far as a career there
Stepped in a pile of puke in the bathroom and had those same shoes stolen (why someone would do that I do not know)
Got lost on my way to New Brunswick, N.J. and ended up in Suffren New York, 60 miles up the Hudson River and was lost in New Brunswick before I found my friend, only to have my suitcase stolen by a hobo. And this wasn’t Meet the Parents; Gaylord Focker didn’t have that darn airline lose his checked bag, I lost it for good.
Relapsed on caffeine…who didn’t see that one coming?
In the meantime, I am stuck here and must survive another six weeks or so before I can officially say I came out alive and well.
To my step dad Dennis and mother, I am sorry. I feel like I have let you down. I did so much to get here, took your money and wasted it away on my education I did not appear to take advantage of.
But this time…no more fucking around. Oh wait. There is a prelim Monday I have to study for. Shit.
Time to go study. Thanks to all of those for your continual support.