Someone just exploded excrement all over the giant fan that is the Minnesota Vikings Monday afternoon. So when times got hard and…hits the fan, the Vikings decided to fire Brad Childress, ending his tumultuous tenure with the Vikings.
The move is not unexpected, but what is unexpected is how the Vikings season has gone for the worst. The Vikings went from a historic run to the NFC Championship and one field goal away from a Super Bowl a season ago game to complete pretenders, who at 3-7 look to be stuck in the whirlpool of elimination.
The Vikings not only hit rock bottom, they hit the Great Barrier Reef with a thud so hard even Brett Favre bounced twice, and Childress four times.
Teddy Roosevelt famously said one should “speak softly but carry a big stick.”
The now former Vikings coach was surely soft-spoken, but didn’t carry much more of a stick than a toothpick.
There was no Moses parting the Red Sea, and no burning bush that could guide Childress and the Vikings in the right direction.
Come to think of it, a flight to Mississippi was probably the worst thing kicker Ryan Longwell and crew could have done.
Favre is having one of the worst seasons of his career, battered and scarred with bruises, cuts and wounds that no life-size band aid can stop.
The bleeding began early, and the Vikings proved to be hemophiliacs.
Childress had about as much control over Favre and his team as a blind man behind the wheel.
Shattered hopes, broken dreams, the Vikings got rid of a weak and powerless leader. Like Dallas, the Vikings owners could not wait for the dreadful season to continue under their coach’s guidance, canning them, but not the kind of canning that preserves your fruits and vegetables.
Rather, they were thrown away like yesterday’s trash, and Childress is no longer the head coach of the Minnesota Vikings. Childress joins the other 9.6 percent of the U.S. population without a job.
So in comes offensive coordinator Leslie Frazier, left to pick up the pieces of a puzzle more scrambled than your morning eggs.
They say that when you hit rock bottom, you can’t go anywhere but up.
At 3-7, it yet remains to be seen whether they will be able to defy the law of gravity and climb up off the bottom, or like a scared and frightened ostrich, stick their head in the sand.
A chilly ending in a currently fitting cold Minneapolis. As Eminem said, this is “as cold as the cold wind blows, when it snows and its 20 below…”
Even Charles Dickens is having a hard time comprehending how this can ever be a tale of two cities.