Borrowed Time–UCLA coach Rick Neuheisel on the sidelines in the Nov. 12 game against Utah. The Bruins losr 31-6 to fall to 5-5 on the season. Neuheisel has been on the proverbial “hot seat” since the beginning of the season with a career 19-26 record through the first four seasons at UCLA. (Jim Urquhart/Associated Press)
Nov. 13, 2011
Being consistently inconsistent is turning into a rerun UCLA does not want to keep replaying.
Highlighted by a season of peaks and valleys, the Rick Neuheisel tenure hit another valley in yet another embarrassing loss, this time at Utah 31-6 Nov. 12. Forget the snow or the fact that Utah became bowl eligible with the win (6-4) and UCLA (5-5, 4-3 Pac-12)…to be determined.
Just when it seems Neuheisel has awoken from the dead, climbed the mountain via crab-walk (Have you tried to crab-walk up a mountain? It’s pretty difficult), or turned fool’s gold into 24-carat stone, the Bruins get caught in a trap, pushed down the mountain they just climbed, or taken 24-carat stone and managing to smash it into a thousand pieces.
A thrilling win only to be followed with a terrible loss. Get embarrassed on national television and lose by 36 points to a 1-6 team who recently fired their coach, then beat Cal and first-place Arizona State in as many weeks, the peaks and valleys of this season are too much to handle for the Bruin faithful.
Might as well go 0-12, because at least then we know what to expect. One week, we are beating a Pac-12 contender, the next trying to find a way to beat San Jose State.
There’s only so many mountains you can turn into molehills, and for Neuheisel’s case, the Bruins got pushed off their last mountain Saturday against Utah, which actually fits quite well since Salt Lake City is 5,000 feet above sea level.
5-5 and still not bowl eligible with two games remaining, Neuheisel faces two scenarios: beat Colorado and lose to USC, or even better, vise versa, or lose both to close out the season 5-7 and without a bowl bid.
If Neuheisel beats Colorado and loses to USC, expect athletic director Dan Guerrero to dropkick Neuheisel straight out of his office because another 6-6 season with another loss to cross-town rival USC does not cut it.
Losing to a 1-6 Arizona team on national television does not cut it. Struggling against a team the school paid $465,000 to come to the Rose Bowl (not to name any names but San Jose State) in front of an empty Rose Bowl does not cut it. Even beating Cal and Arizona State in consecutive weeks doesn’t cut it, because in a season that is constantly changing elevations, we can almost guarantee the Bruins will find a way to take another two steps back.
It might be too early to say, but if Neuheisel does not win out and finish 7-5 before another mediocre bowl bid, he will be out of Westwood one year early.
The fun and games are over. Like Ole Miss head coach Houston Nutt once said: ‘How do you spell fun? W-I-N.’ Did I mention he is also resigning after this season because he can’t seem to be having much “fun” in Oxford.
A loss next week to Colorado, and Neuheisel will have the Bruins treading sand in Death Valley. “Death” might sound a little harsh, but it just happens to be the name of a Valley that happens to be in California that happens to be the lowest point on Earth.
When you climb a mountain in sports, people expect you to stay there longer than a Kim Kardashian marriage. There is no 15 seconds of fame. Only weeks and weeks of it in college football.
Consistently inconsistent. That is the best phrase to describe Neuheisel’s past four years in Westwood. Not a compliment.